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About Me, About Us, About the Blog

I’ve been cosleeping with my daughter from the beginning. I love it. I love waking up to her instant smile. I love that she has always been so vocal in the morning. I love her breath, her face, her eyes, her hands. Cosleeping has truly deepened our relationship. But I am exhausted. Some AP parents sleep soundly with their little ones. Either their babies only nurse a few times a night, or they themselves are deep enough sleepers that they can sleep through the back and shoulder pain, the arm that tingles and falls asleep, the twisted hips. I have sleeping issues and back pain to begin with, and the fact that my daughter nurses literally all night, has made this difficult. No, she doesn’t wake up once every two or three hours to nurse. She wants to nurse every 30-40 minutes. I don’t think I’ve been in a state of deep sleep for over a year now. I am a zombie. I am implementing this plan of getting her to stop nursing so much at night to save my sanity, to make me a better mother.

This blog will be my way of documenting our progress. I’ll update every day until she’s sleeping through the night. This could take a week or two. It could take a few months. You will be here to witness my triumph or defeat.

8 Comments leave one →
  1. patrick emmett permalink
    July 28, 2010 9:42 pm

    Natalie is tired! really tired! and she is a wonderful mom! Hang in there. I know a little somethin ab out lack of deep sleep. it’s really tough; tougher when you have another person to take care of, I imagine.

  2. catherine m permalink
    August 5, 2010 7:56 pm

    i’ll be here reading to witness your triumph! great reading!

  3. Kim permalink
    February 14, 2011 7:59 pm

    What type of bedrail are you uisng? I try to keep my baby in his crib, but when he’s crying at 3am and I have to get up at 5 am I breakdown and take him to bed with me. He’s very mobile now so I don’t want him to fall off the bed.

    • February 22, 2011 5:50 pm

      I used to use this rail, but now we just keep our mattress on the floor and she sleeps in between us so there’s no risk of her falling off and hurting herself.

  4. July 28, 2011 9:34 pm

    Did you succeed? I noticed you havent posted since March… I’m new to blogging (I use blogger) but I also have co-slept with my 15month old daughter from the start for exactly the same reasons as yourself. She is still nursing through the night and I am still so tired. My friends are horrified that my daughter a) doesnt sleep through b) sleeps in my bed and c) is stiil breastfeeding. Any support and advice you could offer would be great… I’ve stopped attending my local BF support group as the women there seem uncomfortable with the age that my daughter is still breastfeeding at.

    i would dearly love to stop nursing through the night. but i dont want to put her out of my bed. And I certainly dont want to make her cry it out…. Did you manage it?


    • September 19, 2011 5:47 pm

      Hi Cheryl. Well, I’m not sure if we’ve succeeded. My daughter is older than 2 now, and she’s still not a solid sleeper. She sleeps for about 3 hours on her own, then cries and wants someone to come be with her. Sometimes she’ll go back to sleep easily and sometimes she’ll want to cuddle with me and be really restless if we don’t. She asks for milk now before dawn, but I think only an hour or so before dawn. I don’t like to get out of bed til 7.

      I haven’t been posting because, well, there’s not great way to do this. I thought I could make a plan, execute the plan, and change my life. Children don’t work that way. I really want to get my daughter to sleep easier, but I feel so stuck. She’s a really sensitive kid anyway, so I’m not really sure what to do except take things one day at a time. My biggest concern right now is getting her to feel more comfortable in her own space. She plays great by herself, and loves entertaining herself. But when it comes to other people, she’s really sensitive.

      Anyway, that’s more than you asked for, but I can say that things are better than they were, but not perfect.

  5. September 19, 2011 10:59 pm

    Hi, thanks for getting back in touch. Since commenting back in July I’ve been looking into the subject and it appears there is no rhyme or reason to a child’s natural sleeping patterns…in fact like every other aspect of their learned behaviours, they appear to all get there in the end :o) Unfortunately that’s not entirely helpful for tired out mums like you and I!

    My daughter is a sensitive wee thing too, very particular about who she’s with. I’m a stay-at-home mum but I can only leave her with her daddy or my parents if I need a break. She won’t stay with anyone else without getting very upset. Since my husband works away from home 5 days a week, that leaves very little scope for such breaks! But it’s ok. I know that one day I’ll be the last person she’ll want to be with so when it gets tough and I’m frustrated and exhausted, I try to remember that. And I try to enjoy the fact she doesn’t want anyone else but me. :o) I know you’ve heard that before (and believe me, I do understand the desire to tear your hair out!) but when you win over the negative you really feel better, more empowered, if you like.

    Don’t feel stuck. It’s not easy, it never has been. That’s why we’re tuned to love them so much – it’s the only way you’d put up with it, haha! Joking aside, from reading your previous posts, you’ve been doing a great job, with your little one’s well-being at the forefront of everything you do.

    Thanks again for getting in touch x

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